I made a change a few days ago that has needed to be done for a long time now. It was emotional for me which I was surprised about which meant I actually cared. Emotional not in the sense that I was not doing the right thing but in a thank you for all the years kinda emotion. I have been having issues with my emotions, keeping them reigned in and not allowing them to go anywhere. You know that word..NUMB, which is how I have felt for a few years now. I hit a speed bump in my life that I never anticipated and it has slowed me down, it put me in a very dark place. The light has been creeping in everyday more and more. The changes I make no matter how slow they may be are changes that are helping me grow again. I'm ok with baby steps right now, it's a speed that I need or I get overwhelmed to easily. I am tired of my internal struggle and I feel myself looking forward now rather than constantly behind. Not only am I the one who is trying but I have something to look forward to everyday. It really makes me happy and it still blows my mind. Yes I am talking about YOU, the only one I care about reading this. You are amazing to me and I want you to see the person I am in every aspect. I hope it never scares you but I am willing to start letting my guard day slowly if you are willing to accept me for ME. No matter where this ride takes us I want to thank you now for coming into my life and reminding me that happiness can exsist in many forms. I like her. I like you...ALOT!
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